Monday, April 15, 2013

Without a Purpose

My brother Steven came over a few days ago.
I was hanging out with Ally at my house. Mom and Dad were out shopping when he walked in the door and announced his presence with "Hello!"
The three of us sat at the kitchen table and ate crackers while we talked about his new house. It was all small talk about Steve's life (he likes to talk about himself) until he went to the bathroom and Ally and I relocated onto the couch.
A few minutes later, we were all talking again in the family room. But for some reason, this time, we started talking about religion.
I am LDS. Steven, on the contrary, is atheist.
He told me all about silly studies and statistics, trying to prove that we don't have divine spirits. I nodded at what he had to say, but I found it all a little sad. He talked about how he doesn't need the church in his life. I thought, I do. What I said was, "If I didn't have the knowledge of the gospel in my life, and the sense of purpose that comes with it, I would be dead because I would have committed suicide by now." And that is 100% true. If I didn't know that I am a spirit with divine worth that will go on to live forever after this life, I would have given up already. What would be the point in living on this earth without a purpose?
He didn't seem very shaken by my statement, but I was, and I started to cry. Even an hour after the conversation, silent tears still puddled under my eyes. Why live without a purpose? I'm so grateful I have one.

I'm also extremely grateful for the opportunity I have to have the gospel in my life. It really has kept me alive. And even though Steve thinks, as he told me, that he's just going to rot in the ground after he dies, I think he'll be surprised when he wakes up again.

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