Everything

I am a brain. A bundle of mushy cords all stuffed inside of a skull, as if that will prevent it from tangling. In fact, I'm only ten percent of a brain. I am small particles within a tangly, mushy blob.

But I am more than a brain. I am a pair of wide feet with terrible circulation. A pair of arms with reasonably flexible skin, judging by the stretch marks. I am a big butt and big thighs. I am a button nose and chapstick-coated lips. I am vocal cords. I am a body with muscles and bruises and a black eye.

And that's not all. I am 18 years worth of photographs. Two and a half journals with missing pages and ticket stubs pasted inside. I am a striped afghan with a hole in the bottom left side. I am a box of Corn Flakes. I am a closet full of clothes. I am a collage of things and fibers and cells and nerves and dreams and nightmares and mushy cords.

My name is Tessa Hatchett. I am a college student. I am an employee. I am a friend, a sister, and a daughter. I am agnostic. I am an intellectual and a philosopher, but I am still a child: goofy and needy and fragile and forgiving. I am a fat bikini-wearer with the will to love herself. I am emotional and logical. I am a piece in the life puzzle of hundreds of people. I am a person. I am so much more than I thought I was twenty-four hours ago when I was cried that I was worth nothing. In fact, I am so many things, I am nearly everything. You are everything, too, and that is definitely worth something.

I'd always thought of he and I as friends, but today I realized we don't actually know that much about each other. We were only friends through her. But she isn't herself. Neither of us know who she even is anymore.

2014: Through Selfies and Snapchats

2014 was difficult. I feel like this is how I start every new year post, but I guess every year just gets comparably worse. This year I attended frequent sessions with a doctor, a nutritionist, and a therapist... all seemingly to no avail. I moved, attended 3 different wards, cried, painted pictures of my old house, and pined for a stable life.
On the other hand, I vacationed to Vegas, California/Disneyland, Idaho, St. Louis/Six Flags, and Illinois. I sang in Chamber Choir, went to a formal dance, was accepted into both colleges I applied to, sang along to concerts, went on dates, bought a new phone, cuddled with my dog every night, and made memories with friends and family that will last forever. That is why I am writing this post. Because this year was arguably the hardest year of my life, but it was full of adventure.